Being the 'Bigger' Friend...

If you read the title to this post and immediately thought 'I can feel her pain' or 'I'm that friend', you will probably already have all the same feelings that I post in this blog, but read on.

I have been apart of many social groups in my life and I'm only 20. Im a social butterfly who just like to talk. I was part of the sports group in high school, the drama group, the choir group, and more. Now, in college I'm apart of my every day friend group, and I still cant escape being the 'bigger friend'. Anytime I talk about being fat or needing to lose weight my friends claim quickly "Audrey, don't say that you are gorgeous!" "You're not fat you're perfect!". I believe them for the moment and move on with life still not losing weight. Then on a Friday night when we are getting ready to go out on the town as a group one of the girls yells, "I can't find anything that looks good!! I am so FAT!" Might I remind you that they weight anywhere from 115 lbs  to 140lbs and I'm over here at a 199 lbs even. So do I still believe them that they dont think my body that has 50 more lbs attached to it isn't fat? Welcome to the life of a woman.

I have spent the last three months of my life two and a half hours away from my boyfriend and family, living with my aunt and uncle and their three gorgeous children. I love every second of it and I wouldnt change it for anything. However, if you're a mom of children or just a caretaker of them, you know that most kids base their whole meal around chips. Lets have chips with mac and cheese, which is also bad for you and I hate it. Lets have chips and cheeseburgers. Lets just have chips! On top of that, lets have every snack in the house! We have to cover everything in cheese, and have chips with it. SO healthy!!

Needless to say my summer weight loss goals turned into weight gain and I don't think ill ever be the skinny person or the sexy girl of the group. BUT who cares! I have already found the man of my dreams who loves me for me! So who cares, right!? WRONG!

I have had that mentality for too long and its the reason that every time I gain five pounds I say "Its just five pounds". And that my friends is how 25 lbs later you realize that you are dangerously over weight no matter who thinks you look fine.

I started my dieting a week ago today and I'm not going to lie to you its one of the hardest things I have to do on a daily basis. How many calories is that? Have I eaten too much? Will that make me fat? How can that skinny girl eat that and still be skinny but I cant?! And so so so much more. Temptations are the worst. Period week, lets not even get into the mad cravings of a tub of sugar that we get. Women have it rough. 

I am not going to keep telling you about how much it sucks but I'm going to tell you how my 199 lb body goes through the cravings, hard work, and discipline every day and keep you posted on my weight loss pound by pound. I also plan to throw in some recipes here and there because cooking truly is my favorite thing to do, healthy or not. I hope some people can relate to my blog and find motivation for the weight loss goals and time in the kitchen.

Starting weight: 199.6 lbs
Starting date: Thursday, August 7 2014
Suggested Articles to read: http://m.prevention.com/weight-loss/weight-loss-tips/steal-these-weight-loss-tips-men/4-he-doesnt-use-food-as-therapist